Something about Me

Hello people,

My name is Wile E. Super Genius

I am currently in my laboratory thinking of ways to besmirch the dastardly Orange Cat that torments me everyday on my outings. I wish I could say that I could turn the other cheek when it comes the orange hairball but if I did I might end up looking like I had a run in with Freddy Krueger. I will tell you a little about myself. When I was a young pup I had a rough life. The people who owned me…yes, I said owned me…didn’t treat me very well. I was often kicked and hit. As I was tied up in the back yard being soaked by a March downpour I finally made my escape by desperately chewing through the harness that held me captive. I was free!!!! Alone on the streets, hungry, and hurt, but free!
Soon the Dog cops caught me and I was held at the “Pound”. It wasn’t as bad as where I was before: I had food, water and a roof over my head. I had three roommates that were very pushy and always stealing all the food, but I guess it could have been worse. My time at the pound was growing short. Everyday people would walk through the halls looking at us and trying to decide if we would go home with them. I waited for my turn, but it didn’t seem like it was going to come. One sunny day, a girl with long flowing brown hair walked up to my cage. She bent down and called to the little black whiney guy laying behind me. He looked up but never came to her. I walked up and placed my paw through the cage to get her attention. I also gave her my best booboo lip. She looked at me and said something to the big lady with her, then walked off. My heart sank into my tail.
Several days passed, and it was looking bleak. Several people came to my cage, and the girl and the big lady came too, but they were looking at the black dog, not me. It didn’t look like I was ever going to get probation. An older gentleman reached down and picked up the little black dog and cuddled him tight. Well, at least I got rid of a roommate. The girl sat down in front of my cage and took a tennis ball out of her pocket. She put it near me to see what my reaction would be (she didn’t know that next to cow and chicken the tennis ball is one of my favorite things). I didn’t know it at the time, but the girl and big lady were in the process of springing me out. I had to have surgery and a microchip before I could leave, but once that was all done the Big Lady came back, scooped me up in a blanket, put me in a warm dog crate, and took me to a new home.

My new home is amazing. I have my own bed with a fuzzy blanket (we refer to it as a woobie). I have tons of toys, food, treats, cookies, but most importantly a family who loves me. I have a girl, a mom and a dad. While my plan for world domination is ongoing, at least I can do it in comfort with the love and support of my new family


Wednesday, July 29, 2009

I Love sunning my buns.....

Today was a beautiful day, not to hot, nice breeze,  so I was lounging on the patio catching some rays.    My mom had mentioned earlier in the week that she needed to go to a tanning bed, since she was as white as a corpse.  My girl is so dark, she looks like hershey's kiss.  I think my mom is a little jealous, and I think thats why she wants to bake in one of those tanning beds.  Anyway, this morning my mom and I were sitting in the chair watching the morning news.  On came a story about how bad tanning beds can be.  It said that if you use a tanning bed under the age of 30 you are 70% more likely to get skin cancer.  


Ok, I think I would rather be pasty white and glow in the dark than risk getting skin cancer or wrinkles.  I don't think wrinkles are attractive, and I don't want to look like an old shoe. 


So I jumped up and kissed my mom and barked at the TV.  I think she got the hint, because she told my girl that there would be no tanning beds in their future.


I always use a little sunscreen when I'm going to be out in the direct sun, to prevent my ears from becoming crispified.  No one wants wrinkley ears... you know its my best feature.


Cheers,


Wile E.


 


 

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